America in Paris

Originally Published:

I'm here in Paris for most of the month of November and I couldn't wait to get here! In my first few days, I munched on 3 types of cheeses, traditional French sausage, Belgian chocolate, fresh baguette, pastry, moules et frites (mussels and fries) and drank (the real) champagne and some smooth French wine. It might be overkill, but it’s good. Thank goodness I'm doing a lot of walking. I am SO happy.

But why do I see Starbucks and Subway and McDonald's and Tex Mex?!?!? I didn't come all this way for that....

Yeah, I know. We live in a global culture now where American stuff is everywhere, right? It’s okay to see Ben & Jerry’s in Saint-Germain-des-Prés and an Indiana (?) Tex Mex Restaurant in the lovely and relatively high-end Marais. It’s okay that some of the Stop signs say “Stop” and not “Arrêtez.” Nu uh.

I’m here for the French stuff: French language, French food, French music, French fashion (ooh la la!), French wine and French men (well, just to look anyway). I want to sit outside at a French café and nurse a cup of coffee…and not from Starbucks! I want to marvel at how everyone seems to get around haphazardly on bicycles and motorcycles while I watch near misses in the roundabouts, but – come on - not on a Harley Davidson! (Sorry, Dad). I don’t want to buy wine from the McDonald’s on The Avenue des Champs-Élysées, the most profitable Mickey D’s in the world, by the way. And if I see Jared from Subway (nooooo!), he’d better be speaking French and sporting a cool beret! “Bonjour. Je m’appelle Jared et j’adore le Subway!”

I want my rent-a-car to be a Citroen and not a diesel Chrysler Jeep Cherokee (yep, saw a few). I want to look at property listings and fantasize about my Parisian pied-à-terre and be on HGTV International, but I don’t want a doggone Century 21 agent, unless the agent works for "Siècle Vingt et Un." I want to buy flowers from Aurelie’s or Amelie’s Fleurs, not L.A. Fleurs. (Really? L.A. Fleurs?) And if I have to watch an American movie with Zac Efron (and I don’t), don’t change Charlie St. Cloud to Le Secret de Charlie so I get confused! Be consistent and stay American. C’mon now, I’m in Paris!

I know there are more examples of The American Way (pun intended) in Paris that I’ve either not seen yet or simply neglected to mention (like the fact that French television has too many English-speaking stations now!), but I’m thinking you probably get the idea. All I know is that while I’m here, I’m wearing my beret tilted to the side and bringing a baguette home every day. So there.

It won’t be much longer until I have to leave and go back to the US so trust me when I tell you I’m over here acting all Frenchified for as long as I can (see above). I’m walking more, shopping more and yes, probably drinking more wine, but hey, c’mon…I’m in Paris!